In the face of life’s final moments, Nancy Tan finds strength and purpose in her role as a home palliative nurse, offering comfort, love, and dignity to those on their last journey. Her story is one of dedication, transforming sorrow into blessings every day.
TURNING SADNESS INTO BLESSINGS
“My profession is closely related to death,” shared Nancy Tan, a home palliative nurse with Tzu-Chi Foundation (Singapore). On average, she bids farewell to six to seven patients each month. Friends and family often ask if her work saddens her, given the constant confrontation with mortality. With quiet strength, she admitted to feeling grief but added, “I turn my sadness into blessings.”
Nancy’s day begins with her pulling a black suitcase filled with medical supplies and emergency equipment as she commutes via private hire vehicles to visit patients. “This is what we nurses do,” she once told a driver as she unloaded her bag. Each day, she visits four to five patients, sometimes accompanied by a doctor or volunteer. Together, they monitor vital signs, check for abnormal sounds in the lungs, and ensure that any discomfort is addressed promptly.
At one home, Nancy greeted her patient with her usual warmth: “Mr. Sim, your nurse is here! Where should I place the oxygen concentrator?” While the task of setting up the device seemed straightforward, her work in home hospice care is anything but ordinary. “In home hospice, I’ve handled many ad hoc emergencies. Everything is unpredictable,” she remarked.
ALWAYS READY
A common question from families is, “Nurse, how long do you think my loved one can live?” Nancy’s answer is always measured: “It all depends.” The unpredictable nature of her patients’ conditions means Nancy is on call around the clock. Even in the middle of the night, she is just a phone call away.
“Every minute is valuable, both to the family and to myself. I cherish the opportunity to see them every day, but I’m aware that I may not see them again tomorrow,” she said. Since starting her role in 2016, Nancy has strived to make the most of every moment.
Her mobile phone is her lifeline, keeping her connected with colleagues, caregivers, and families. Wherever she is, Nancy remains adaptable, responding to emergencies and adjusting her plans as needed. “I’ll discuss it with Dr. Tan Chun Yeal and meet her later. I’m going to Chua Chu Kang first,” she explained.
EXPRESSING CARE THROUGH TOUCH
Home hospice care requires a multidisciplinary approach, with doctors playing a critical role. Nancy collaborates closely with them to manage severe symptoms like breathlessness, intense pain, or hallucinations, ensuring all necessary medications are available.
One caregiver shared her emotional struggle: “Taking care of the elderly is not easy. Just now, when my mother said she didn’t recognise me, it broke my heart.” She expressed deep gratitude to the home palliative team, saying, “Without them, I wouldn’t have known how to get through this myself.”
Nancy understands the importance of psycho-spiritual support, not just for patients but also for their families and helpers. “We need to be more observant. When we comfort, we hold the patient and touch them with love,” she said. Through this simple act of touch, Nancy conveys care and concern, helping patients embrace their life-limiting illnesses and live fully before passing.
A CALLING FILLED WITH LOVE
Palliative care demands high emotional intelligence, especially when dealing with the varied attitudes of patients and their families. Nancy takes it in stride, saying, “I don’t let those attitude issues affect me. I’ve learnt to let go.” She respects her patients’ final wishes and approaches each day as an opportunity to serve without expecting anything in return.
At home, Nancy’s children occasionally ask, “Mum, don’t you feel tired?” Her reply is always the same: “Tiredness never crosses my mind because I love what I do. Choose what you love, and love your choice.”
Nancy’s work is a testament to resilience and compassion, reminding us all to cherish the present and embrace life fully.